ithildin: (Art - Forest Quill)
ithildin ([personal profile] ithildin) wrote2008-07-07 11:25 am

Ficlet: 'Black Isn't My Colour' (01/01)

Yeah, yeah, yeah... Tell me about it. The tipping point was the conversation over at [livejournal.com profile] ironman_lounge this morning, and the result was this.

Characters: Agent Coulson, Michael Westen.
Notes: PG, Iron Man/Burn Notice.
Summary: Michael considers a unique employment opportunity.

Black Isn't My Colour


The guy at the corner table screamed 'Fed' – black suit, black tie, white shirt. But more than that, it was the air of innocuousness that contrasted with eyes that didn't miss a thing. Yeah. He was definitely the meeting.

Walking over, he took a seat opposite the fed without waiting for an invitation. "Michael Westen," he introduced himself. "You rang?"

"I did, Mr. Westen. Agent Phil Coulson, SHIELD."

"Never heard of it."

"That isn't surprising, Mr. Westen. Not many have. We're an agency with a very unique imperative."

"It's good to be special." He sounded bored, though he was anything but. A covert government agency he'd never heard of?

Agent Coulson's lips hinted at something that almost might have been a smile in the right light. "Speaking of which, you're something of a special case yourself."

"Oh, come on now; don't believe everything you read, Agent Coulson. I'm just a guy trying to make a living."

"I suppose that's one perspective."

Feigning impatience, he sighed. "Look, while this has been fun, can we get to the point of just why you asked me here?"

"It's fairly simple, Mr. Westen. You're a man with unique talents; talents that SHIELD could use." Before Michael could respond, he added, "No, we had nothing to do with the burn notice, but we can make it go away.”

"If I come work for you." He was insanely curious. Did Coulson's outfit really have the pull to override the Agency?

Coulson nodded. "If you come work for us."

"Okay, let's say I accept your incredibly kind offer. Hypothetically of course, just what would I be doing for SHIELD?"

"Hypothetically, you'd be in charge of a very special project. I'm assuming you've heard of Tony Stark?"

Nodding, he replied, "Yeah, it was all over the papers. Said he was Iron Man. A real three ring circus. If that was SHIELD's handiwork, you guys need some practice on the whole covert thing." Smiling a smile that was all teeth, he leaned back in his chair. Oh yeah, that got a reaction.

"Mr. Stark is unpredictable," Coulson allowed. "And as such, requires very particular handling."

Voice pitched low, he asked, "You need him taken care of? Is that what this is about?" Damn it, he might want out from under the burn notice, but assassinating a U.S. citizen, a very famous one at that, wasn't how he'd choose to go about it.

"Nothing quite so dramatic, Mr. Westen," he said dryly. "Quite the opposite, in fact. Mr. Stark's brain is considered something of a national security asset; an asset that would be your job to protect."

"I baby-sit the billionaire playboy superhero and that gets me out from under the burn notice?" He sounded doubtful.

This time Coulson actually chuckled. "Believe me, it will be more than a fair exchange. You haven't met Mr. Stark yet, but you'll see."

How bad could it be? Move to the west coast, away from mom – now that was a double plus right there – out from under the burn notice, and play babysitter. Sweet.

"You have yourself a deal, Agent Coulson." He extended a hand which the other man shook.

"Good to have you on board, Mr. Westen."

Michael put on his sunglasses. "Just one thing; I don't do the suit. Black isn't my colour."

End
ext_1718: (Iron Man Tony awesome)

[identity profile] beeej.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 06:51 pm (UTC)(link)
The thought of Jeffrey Donovan's spy guy staying oh so very close to Tony at all times is sending me to my happy place. ;)
ext_9031: (Default)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 06:54 pm (UTC)(link)
[snorfle] I was actually elaborating on my crack fic idea this weekend and said I could definitely go for a threesome -- Tony, Micheal, and Fiona [g]

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[identity profile] dejla.livejournal.com - 2008-07-08 14:33 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] sharpiesgal.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 06:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Nin shouldn't have yelled at ya. This was made of win...lol

ext_9031: (Default)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Hopefully I got it out of my system!

[identity profile] direwraithe.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:18 pm (UTC)(link)
All I can hear in my head is one of Weston's patented voiceovers...

"When protecting billionaire playboy superheroes, three things must always be remembered... he will get into trouble if you try and stop him from doing so, the trouble will always be your fault, and if you try and avoid the trouble it will come and find you..."
ext_9031: (Iron Man -  Party)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:21 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL!

[identity profile] rodlox.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Tony'll get to the West Coast...and find Fiona already there, waiting for him. ;D

excellent fic!
ext_9031: (Default)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:22 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sure she will be!

Thanks :)

[identity profile] kesomon.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh god, MORE. Please!
ext_9031: (Art - Pink Pool)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:26 pm (UTC)(link)
We'll see [g] Glad you enjoyed it :)

[identity profile] splash-the-cat.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:34 pm (UTC)(link)
This is great! And oh, Michael. The lesson you are about to learn...
ext_9031: (Iron Man - Tony B&W)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

And to think this all sorta started because I had a mental image of Fiona rummaging in Tony's fridge for a yogurt [g]

[identity profile] wizefics.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:47 pm (UTC)(link)
This is totally made of awesome and win and I think I love you a little bit. (Nice to meet you by the way. *lol*)

Oh, God. The things you've just done to my brain.

*whimpers*

I like it so so so much...
ext_9031: (Iron Man -  Party)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 07:50 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL! Nice to meet you too! Sorry about your brain though. Totally unintentional!

I'm very glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading. And I hope the brain is better soon [g]

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[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 08:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Now that's a cracker of an idea if ever I read one. Just one small thing, it's actually spelled Westen with an -en not an -on.
ext_9031: (Default)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Ack! Crud! Thank you! [baps brain]

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[identity profile] ffutures.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 08:37 pm (UTC)(link)
I give it four days for Tony to make a pass at Michael's girlfriend, about the same time for Fee to get jealous of Pepper, a week for Michael's mother to make a pass at "that nice Mr. Jarvis" over the phone, and ten days before Michael quits...

ext_9031: (Art - Haida Mask)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 08:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Michael's mom making a pass at Jarvis! [snicker]

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[identity profile] dejla.livejournal.com - 2008-07-08 14:32 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] mymatedave.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 08:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Just the idea of this is worthy of applause. Bravo!
ext_9031: (Art - Haida Mask)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-07 08:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you :)

[identity profile] some-day-soling.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 01:56 am (UTC)(link)
HeeHeeHee! I love it!

And I need a Tony Stark Icon. I'm going to have to peruse yours again.
ext_9031: (Default)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 02:48 am (UTC)(link)
Glad you liked it :)

[identity profile] ninjababe.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 01:59 am (UTC)(link)
I haven't read yet, but I have to say...

You rock.

Booya!

Now, to read it!

[identity profile] ninjababe.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 02:36 am (UTC)(link)
OK... I've read it. And, I repeat: You rock.

How bad could it be? Move to the west coast, away from mom – now that was a double plus right there – out from under the burn notice, and play babysitter. Sweet.

Ah, famous last words... Especially when Fi shows up...

And, damn you! You caused me to commit fic!

Go Here (http://ninjababe.livejournal.com/128700.html)

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[identity profile] strangevisitor7.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 04:48 am (UTC)(link)
I loved this! Perfect voices. How did I miss it today - good thing I was collecting for the Crossover news letter. LOL

I can't wait to see where this goes. Is Fi coming along? - Tony would just love her!

ext_9031: (Default)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 05:54 am (UTC)(link)
I didn't realize you hadn't seen it. When you said you were looking forward to reading it, I thought you meant it was in your queue to read [g] Hence my replies.

[identity profile] izhilzha.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 07:17 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, this is completely made of win. *g*
ext_9031: (Art - Lily Pond)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 03:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you very much :)

[identity profile] dejla.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 02:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, this is hysterical. Babysitting, my ass--Michael's going to be fighting for hazard pay!
ext_9031: (Art - Pink Pool)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 03:52 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL! How true!

[identity profile] nessa5.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 03:18 pm (UTC)(link)
I'll add to the squeeeee
that was fun
thank you
I'm going to send a copy to my hubby, he likes both Burn Notice and Iron Man.
:)
ext_9031: (Art - Royo: Burn)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-08 03:52 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm glad you enjoyed it :) Hope hubby does too!

[identity profile] lizbet0.livejournal.com 2008-07-09 03:14 am (UTC)(link)
I just finished watching a Burn Notice DVD, so this is particularly special for me right now! *sighs happily*

This is just such fabulous crack!fic! *grins madly* Please tell me you're considering doing more?!

*sending hugs & plot bunnies your way*

[identity profile] lizbet0.livejournal.com 2008-07-09 03:15 am (UTC)(link)
(P.S. Thanks for making such a lovely icon for me to use, too!)

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[identity profile] shadowhuntress.livejournal.com 2008-07-09 06:51 am (UTC)(link)
OH GOD YES. Wonderful idea and brilliantly executed. It left me with such a huge smile on my face. :-D
ext_9031: (Art - Callanish)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-09 03:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you :) I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[identity profile] agilebrit.livejournal.com 2008-07-14 05:43 pm (UTC)(link)
How bad could it be?

Oh, Michael, honey, you have NO IDEA. LMAO.

We watched the BN pilot last night. YUM.
ext_9031: (Iron Man -  Party)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2008-07-14 05:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Isn't BN awesome?

I think poor Micheal will be wishing for Miami in short order!
ext_1770: @ _jems_ (fandom: bn burned)

[identity profile] oxoniensis.livejournal.com 2009-04-05 09:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Loved this!
ext_9031: (Art - Wildwood)

[identity profile] ithildyn.livejournal.com 2009-04-05 10:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you!