Keeps Keeping On

[ithildin]

Took a bad fall Saturday, twisted my foot, smashed my knee up. I'll live. Hurts a lot though. In the end, it's just one more thing to deal with. Still catch myself seeing 'For Rent' signs and thinking 'that might work for Tammy'. Then I remember she's dead. I try not to cry if people are around. Pretty sure everyone's tired of me by now. Haven't written a word, and have absolutely no desire to write. There's just nothing there to put on the page. All I really want to do is sleep, but can't even manage that properly either. Pretty sure in the dictionary next to the word 'fail' is a picture of me.

Comments

[elmyraemilie]

You're grieving, not failing. No point in trying to force yourself out of it; sometimes embracing grief and sort of admitting to it is the only thing that helps. You can absorb it like an amoeba, so it's not an external thing to be afflicted by, but just a small part of your whole self that you can honor.

It's clear how much you love Tammy. That depth of emotion is something to be proud of.

::hugs::

[rainbow]

*healing vibes* *hugs offered* i'm so sorry you're around people who don't (or won't) accept your grief and give you space and comfort in which to heal.

grieving isn't failing. grieving is love and loss and healthy, and it takes time to go through. there's no "right" timeline, either. everyone has their own path through it.

[omens]

:( :( (((hugs))) I'm sorry you're having such a rough time.

[elistaire]

I'm sorry to hear about your injury. For the other, it takes its own time to heal from grief. Give yourself as much time as you need.

[holde_maid]

*huggles*

[holde_maid]

Pain is something we cannot ignore, it tells us how deeply we are affected, be it physically or emotionally.

When it comes to our body, treating the symptom that pain is sometimes makes sense, once the message has been received. However, that way we do lose the info pain can give us on how we're doing in terms of recovery. Sometimes, the relief is worth it.

Unfortunately, the soul works in a different way. We have to move THROUGH the pain to get rid of it properly, or to deal with it properly. That, at least, is my experience.

Give yourself a year. If in a year the pain still is very strong, then get help, because it may have turned into a depression that goes beyond recovery from the loss.