ithildin | A Set of Eyes?

So I finished my Dan is Methos fic! Dang, I don't believe I did it! But now, I've poked and tweaked and rewritten it so many times, I was wondering if anyone would be willing to be a second set of eyes? I know there's not time for a proper beta, since it's due Wednesday, but if a willing victim could just read it over and tell me if anything really stupid leaps out?

And now it's way past my bedtime! But I do feel a sense of accomplishment even though I'm so sleepy.

Till tomorrow :)